Pastors Hide to Die Alone

This term, used by a friend, conveys a powerful message about the tragic consequences, for some ministries, when they do not receive adequate support. Can a pastor, or any other full-time servant of God, request and receive adequate help? Who should they contact? Under what circumstances can they "take a break".

All forms of crisis, from the most common to the most extreme, are found in ministries. 

Discouragement, a sense of failure, exhaustion, true depression, moral fall, abandon of the ministry, and even suicide. All forms of crisis, from the most common to the most extreme, are found in ministries. Even with the work done with people like me, the church still sees these crisis and topics as taboos. Few studies dare to approach them, and even fewer solutions are offered. Yet after having lived around churches for a few years, we have all seen or heard of them.

I knew a pastor who, driven by the need to confess his temptations and spiritual warfare to a “friend”, found himself denounced, and rejected, by the denomination to which he belonged. He was never given the chance to be heard or receive assistance of any kind. The case was dismissed and the denomination was spared a potential "risk", but is this how we are called to care for each other? Have Jesus, and the apostles, not given us the duty of accompaniment? (Matthew 18:15-20 and John 5:20)

Don't our attitudes of denial of the need to listen, and help ministries, contribute to hypocrisy, distrust and isolation, leading many to pretend that "all is well" when deep down their struggle is raging?

Any one who works in counseling, of any kind, must have someone they can call on to help them process, and vent, the tensions of their work. To whom can pastors turn to when they are in need of help?

I have often heard the following remark: “pray to God and it will be alright”. I believe in the power of prayer, but is it always enough or even, in some cases, the best solution? What about the brotherhood in between God's servants? 

“You are examples, you don't have the right to be in suffering or have any problems.”

A missionary couple once, gave us this testimony: While they were suffering from exhaustion and asked for a time of spiritual rest after difficult years in their work, their leaders gave this answer: "You are examples, you don't have the right to be suffering, or have any problems." They decided to leave this organization, since nothing had been put in place to help its hurting members, they were not worth it!

Why do such behaviors exist within the Christian world, when we offer help to any in need, through the Church.

Do we tend to focus on the results at the expense of individuals, or the 'appearance of' to  the expense of reality?  Are we an army fighting without a field hospital for its soldiers? Do we believe that denying the existence of our own suffering will make it disappear?

Let’s think of the human cost this represents each year, to suffering families and also assembly members who become collateral damage! How can the sheep not feel the effects of their shepherd in crisis, even if it's involuntary?

I know of another pastor who, having reached his limits, decided to take advantage of the opportunity afforded him of taking a sabbatical. He found a regular job, living the life of a regular christian, with its pressures and frustrations, and shared his faith at every opportunity he had. He took care of his marriage and his children, and attended “incognito” in another church and listened to the Word of God. After a year of recovery, the Lord opened a door for him to lead a small church in another city. He then prayed about this opportunity, and accepted the position, which lead him to an extremely blessed period of service, during which time, the new church increased fivefold within a few years!

Let us remember that we are managers of the Divine spiritual calling in 2 John 8:

“Watch out that you do not lose what we have worked for, but that you may be rewarded fully.”

So, what can we do to not ruin, or lose our ministries? What are some solutions? 

Preparation for ministry, prevention, support, crisis resolutions, sabbaticals, continuing training... the debate is still open! 

To learn more about Eric and Rachel's ministry, click here.